Until Autumn Leaves

by scruffian

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1.
April may love you when the morning comes June lifts you up and sets you free She came shining from the clouds above She came to rescue me The grass has grown and the leaves are green Their shadows move and dance They make me see what I want to be So I resolve to take a chance How long until it's over How much longer til the fall I can't imagine being older We will always be... But you were all I ever wanted The things you've seen are in your eyes Reflections of the clouds above Flowers spring into your mind I hope I don't forget this love Missed chances bearing down on me So scared of what I might find Years and years and years of leaves Blown through the corners of my mind How long until it's over How much longer 'til the fall I can't imagine being older We will always be... But you were all I ever wanted And when our atoms separate And drift apart through space Bits of me will find Bits of you and they'll bind But you were all I ever wanted
2.
I lay dormant Under the mountain Into another world, you fell In the shadow of the tower blocks Just like a little weed Like a drifting seed That's cast to the four winds Carried on the thermals Into the vapour trails Until you were Set down beside me Just like a little weed I have gone to seed I'll never go back Covered up with filthy dirt and buried in the ground As the tractor draws the furrows out long and straight and brown And this wrinkled brow reminds me of your frown And everything I grow on cracks and tumbles down Just like a little weed That doesn't make a sound I'll be climbing up your walls until They break and fall down We sprouted in the oak's shadow Where Autumn falls slow and bright And though my roots are only shallow I reach out towards the light Just a like a little weed I will never reach Just a like a little weed I will never reach And never grow back The only thing I asked you when you left me was who will dry your eyes But hope and light and fear replied like bats swooping in the dark And all the while you clung to me like my drenched shirt I hung on every word But now you've outgrown me and I am left alone And everything I touch turns to stone Just like a little weed Left out in the cold What will become of me When I get old...
3.
I sat staring out the library window for ten minutes or more Just watching the rain and the way the droplets form I trace the tracks that they take through the condensation on the window pane Like the paths that we make though a conversation in the pouring rain And though I tried so hard to tell you every day Somehow, no matter how hard, I couldn't find the right words to say Now the water's flooding out and its running down my cheeks Everywhere I go I thought I'd catch a glimpse At the bus shelter I sat next to you I didn't know what to do So we just sat there in silence Why do buses always come in threes? You caught the one in front of me And all the way home I watched its red tail lights Dancing in the spray Squinting through to catch a glimpse of you Every raindrop that falls Runs into the ocean Washed out of the gutter and into the draught And into the ocean and The ocean will rise the ocean will fall All over everything And though I might rise and though I might fall Until the ocean ends And though my stop had come to soon And the bus had stopped again I got off and started walking up my broken garden path Put my key in the rusty lock Looking back over my shoulder Push the door and then go in As you drive away So pick me up and bury me home, gently You're lifting me up and bearing me home, gently Set me down there and bury me here, gently You let me down then so let me go now, gently
4.
Deep in the dark woods of my heart something stirs Things can never be back like they were When the winter comes and it gets cold I don't know here where i'll go when I get old Mark my way with sticks and stones To the tree tops where I make my home At first all the trees look the same Now I know them all by name Deep in the forest of your heart something calls Into the darkness I stumble and fall Stay up here for the rest of my life Far away from my trouble and strife Every evening stuck in the same room Dust catches the silver light of the moon Pile the stones up high In concentric circles 'til they reach the sky And when I'm gone If you look for me You will find me here In my place In the blossom Of my own tree And your face I live on In the funny gait Of my own shed Like a happy face I live on In the attic In my own shoes Dusted with skin I live skin In the warm embrace Of the long sun As the day ends I live on
5.
You were looking for someone to hold your hand I was walking down the avenue, away from you I don't want to be your special one just yet I'm not old enough, I'm only about seven years old in my head And I needed you more than I wanted you before 'Cause I can't sing the little boy blues Without you, without you Well I've tried but what can I do Without you, without you I don't want this kind of trouble yet I just want to play on the slides and swings And ride my bike and kick a ball and things I want to hide away in my treehouse and sing 'Cause I can't sing the little boy blues Without you, without you Well I've tried but what can I do Without you, without you I didn't understand why you looked at me that way Why can't you believe that just 'cause you right down our names and add them up Whatever percentage it scores it doesn't mean we're in love It doesn't mean that yet, and I'm only about seven years old in my head And I needed you more than I wanted you before 'Cause I can't sing the little boy blues Without you, without you Well I've tried but what can I do Without you, without you And I can't pretend I'm not one piece without you Without you, without you So please wait just a couple more years 'Til I'm through, I'm through Just please wait just another few more years And I'll take you to review But for now can't we just play in the trees And now can't we just be friends And now let's just take our pretty little time 'Cause I still need you 'Cause I can't sing the little boy blues Without you, without you Well I've tried but what can I do Without you, without you
6.
04:01
Your hands are not very warm But you're heart's cold And my heart is hard And these words are bold The sound of a thousand raindrops Landing in your ears Drowns out any of your words Which might have made it through to me When I looked into your eyes I saw another universe Which came as some surprise And I wanted to fall in The rain trapped us indoors again Watch another Saturday blow over We don't like to shut up much But we don't care so much if we're alone We only wear clothes that match So we wear the same thing every day Now all my clothes they smell of you And the edges have begun to fray I know I don't have to dress up for you I know that you'll love me whatever I wear But looking like you helps us stick like glue And helps me to know I belong somewhere I found that letter again And it took me back to that awful night when Your parents wouldn't let you leave So away we ran Later when the drizzle cleared Standing by that frozen lake The falling sun was drenching us Its long cold light keeps us awake Rain runs down my neck As I run to you at top speed And puddles splash up my legs But you were all I need I made a list of all I need But you were all I put on it So pack your bags to go away You'll go away anywhere Away from here
7.
It's too late now to take it back But I didn't have to bite off your head And since then all I can think about Is what you might have said In the long iight of the evening Our shadows stretch out across the open fields And through the smoke I caught a glimpse Of your dappled haze It stings our eyes And makes them cry Now the ash is gently falling from the sky and settling Over everything like a carpet of snow So please forget about my lies in the light of your eyes I still imagine in your arms Like the fool that I am The parakeets dive my head And the ducks and swans glide away And I will never know now What you were going to say It shouldn't be this cold in May And these rushes remind me of the hay In which we used to play And your eyelashes And this wind drives me mad And flicks through the pages I've never read And messes up our hair I still wonder what the morning will bring and whether the sun spins And why it is the moon's always showing the same face It's funny how it's orbit's in proportion to it's spin I still think about your questions Like the fool that I am Clouds drifting in the blue Translucent leaves with the evening sun infused And this long grass sticks like glue And we pick our way through The worst thing is how it silenced you And cut short our conversation And now all I want to know Is what was in your head And now I'll never know And now I'll never know I want to know what moves you across these summer lawns So please don't try so hard when you know you don't have to I still think about my lies in the pools of your eyes I still forget too easily Like the fool that I am
8.
The grey plane trees hang on their leaves For longer than the beech and hornbeam And set ablaze the grey skyline It reminds us of the great fire of London Out in the woods a hundred miles away A squirrel gathers nuts and leaves So pack up all your things in crates This good ship sets sail today Waves roll by like months in Autumn The shadows fall like leaves Cling on tightly to the bow In the morning we must leave I will sleep 'til we get there Looking back over last years There's piles of rubbish where we used to play And on the last day of September This good ship sets sail today So furl and hoist for fifty furlongs Where we're going we cannot say The Autumn wind billows our sails And drifting we meander away Waves roll by like months in Autumn The shadows fall like leaves Cling on tightly to the bow In the morning we must leave I will stop until we get there
9.
I've been strong I've been looking for The place where I belong I've been wrong I've out the door And laughing too long It's a cold world, a cold world The light will go away But I'm not listening The nights are getting long But I'm not listening Summer's gone My hands are raw The night is growing long Clouds roll on Lying on the floor They're moving me along It's a cold world, a cold world The light will go away But I'm not watching The nights are growing cold But I'm not listening
10.
They keep moving us along From place to place Until we vanish without trace So I keep moving on From town to town Until the ocean waves Swallow me and I drown So we run away To the railway Derelict and lonely Scramble for a seat And something to eat Brambles grab my feet They try to keep us off the streets Hiding in our railway dens Barbed wire hedges us into pens Herding us from street to street So we shake the dust from off our feet Clamber over garden fences Crawling through fox holes in hedges We have stayed here for too long So we'll go back where we belong Beside the railway lines But I've got no strings in this town It makes me laugh when I am down I've got no strings at all You'll never hold me down So I travel round From town to town Play my little heart out Drowned out by planes And screaming trains Scavenge for remains That fall half eaten from your table This food chain Feeds my shame Doubled up with self doubt In the pouring rain Washed down the drain Everyone's the same Filled with same pain Hiding in our railway dens Barbed wire hedges us into pens Herding us from street to street So we shake the dust from off our feet Clamber over garden fences Crawling through fox holes in hedges We have stayed here for too long So we'll go back where we belong Beside the railway lines But I've got no strings in this town It makes me laugh when I am down I've got no strings at all You'll never hold me down In warehouses and railway sheds We live beside the railway lines Build a camp with wood that someone Dumped between the railway lines Huddle round a car fire Toasting scraps and bacon rinds Wrapped in singed and smokey carpet Abandoned by the railway lines Fish and chips and blackberries We found behind the railway lines On other people's mattresses We lay beneath the railway lines Forgotten houses, broken blinds Piles of rubbish and for sale signs Are all that's left of what was standing Here before the railway lines I'll spend my days Beside the railway lines Ill wend and I'll stray Beside the railway lines I'll rend and I'll fray Beside the railway lines I'll mend my ways Beside the railway lines I'll bend and go gray Beside the railway lines I'll end my stay Beside the railway lines
11.
Summer has gone again The leaves are falling from the trees Hedges burst with bright rose hips I can taste them on my lips Until Autumn leaves These leaves were not growing for long Budded blossomed bloomed and now they're gone And now they stay on the ground Where the earthy worms will grind them down Until autumn leaves Winter's cold grip clamps again Mud slides under my feet Frost bites hard and the snow falls down As the autumn leaves Spring has sprung again The sap is pumping through the trees Stems rise up and break new ground Birds fly free, wheels spin round We will ride until Autumn leaves Autumn's crown will fall again The seasons cycle in their chain Sunset notches up a gear They tread the tracks of the former years We will ride until autumn leaves

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Recorded between 2006 and 2011 in snatched moments with cheap equipment.

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released December 19, 2011

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scruffian England, UK

Music is meant to be fun, that's why we 'play' it.

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